When Love Is Safe: How to Recognize Respect vs. Gaslighting

JILL | INNER HEALING COACH
Aug 18
2 min read

Not all abuse is loud. Some of it whispers in ways that make you question your memory, your worth, and even your sanity. That’s the danger of gaslighting—it's emotional manipulation designed to make you doubt your reality, your feelings, and your voice.

But let me say this loud for the woman still second-guessing herself:

You are not too sensitive. You are not crazy. You are not imagining things.

Gaslighting can sneak into a relationship masked as concern, logic, or even love. But real love? It doesn't leave you feeling confused, small, or emotionally starved.

🚫 What Gaslighting Sounds Like:

"You're too sensitive."
"That never happened."
"You're imagining things."
"You're overreacting."
"You made me do this."

Each of these phrases slowly chips away at your confidence, clarity, and peace. And over time, you begin to lose sight of what healthy love is supposed to look like.

💬 What Respect Sounds Like:

"I didn’t realize that hurt you—can you help me understand?"
"I remember it differently—let’s talk about it."
"Your feelings are valid—even if I don’t fully get them."
"Let’s clarify what happened so we’re on the same page."
"I take responsibility for how I reacted."

See the difference? One uses shame to control. The other uses humility to connect. The first erodes trust. The second builds it.

Empowered Woman of God — You Deserve More

Sis, you were not created to shrink for someone else's comfort. God didn’t give you discernment and sensitivity to be dismissed or demeaned. He gave you wisdom. He gave you a voice. And He’s not the author of confusion.

🕊️ Walk in truth—not fear.

🕊️ Stand in faith—not emotional chaos.

🕊️ Rest in His love—not guilt or shame.

You deserve a love that reflects Christ—patient, kind, and rooted in truth. Not manipulation disguised as passion. Not blame disguised as love. You deserve peace. You deserve clarity. You deserve a love where you can rest and feel safe to be your full, feminine, God-created self.

“She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.” – Proverbs 31:25

Ready to Start Healing?

If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in a cycle of confusion, mixed signals, and emotional exhaustion, it’s time to break free and learn how to recognize real love.

Start with my Redeeming Your Love Dating eBooks — faith-based, trauma-informed guides for women who are ready to:

✅ Heal from past abuse

✅ Date with clarity and confidence

✅ Set healthy boundaries

✅ Discern truth from manipulation

✅ Attract emotionally mature, godly men

💛 There’s a way to love without losing yourself. Let me show you how.

👉 Shop the eBooks here (Available for women 30+ and young women 18+)

You are worthy of a love that doesn't require you to abandon yourself to keep it.

Start your healing today.

You are not too much. You are waking up. You are worthy of peace. Let today be the day you start walking toward it. 💛

—Written with love